If you are a new site visitor, kindly check out "My Top 50 Funny Computer Quotes" post to know what I mean.Inspired by that one and since it’s been a long time that I wrote or posted some funny stuff here, I decided to collect a few more amusing quotes. Funny Computer Meme Hacks A Computer Thinks Is Cool Picture. I have been reading some of my old posts here and noticed one that is still quite popular simply because a lot of us love humor. Funny Computer Quotes from History "Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons." S m b d st l ll th v w ls fr m m k yb rd! When someone means a lot to you, but it was never meant to be and you just have to let go; Whoever is trying to bring you down is already below you _Yes_ No, Ubuntu is an ancient African word, meaning "can't configure Debian", Re: 34. Posted on by maxy. !The Only program that works perfectly every time..... Any fool can write a blog, and most of them do. Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old computer quotes, computer sayings, and computer proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. -- Kristian Wilson, Nintendo, Inc, 1989. Keyboard not found...Press any key to continue. ", Karl Marx: "The production of too many useful things results in too many useless people. Computer and car is same...1-it needs driver2-it needs key.3-it needs windows. Windows NT, actually means Windows Nice Try. 2. ""Windows XP to Windows 7: It's like upgrading from George W. Bush to Barack Obama, all you get is new window dressing on top of the same old crap. ", Andy Rooney: "Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done. Funny Computer Meme Still Waiting For Pete To Be Funny Photo Computer Sayings and Quotes for Instagram “Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes.” “A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.” “The computer was born to solve problems that did not exist before” “Physics is the universe’s operating system” takes three times longer to complete than expected; a carefully planned project will take only twice as long. ", Jeff Pesis: “Hardware: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked.”, Author Unknown: "The attention span of a computer is only as long as its power cord. Funny Computer Meme I Will Be Right There Mum Just Hacking Into The Nasa Photo. Funny Quotes or Sayings: "Technology" Group 2 AT&T to wed T-Mobile. That doesn't mean we don't have process. If you don't have fences, you don't need Gates. – Abraham Lincoln. ", Havelock Ellis: "The greatest task before civilization at present is to make machines what they ought to be, the slaves, instead of the masters of men. Trust Window Never. Bush. See more ideas about funny, computer humor, funny pictures. Download App. Discover and share Funny Computer Quotes And Sayings. Reboot your joke collection with these funny computer jokes, wifi puns and tech jokes that don’t require a restart. in a life without walls, who needs Windows? hAS ANYONE SEEN MY cAPSLOCK KEY? (Louis … The good news about computers is that they do what you tell them to do. ~Doug Larson ... A computer will do what you tell it to do, but that may be much different from what you had in mind. Microsoft just bought out Hoover vacuum cleaners. Following the ceremony there will be no reception. Read These Funny Quotes About Toyota and the Prius, The Keys to Writing a Company Vision Statement. - Emo Philips, back off, or i'll replace you with a small shell script. Weinberg's second lawIf builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization. We are not interested in it.”– Bill Gates, 1993. – A. The program was working fine until you used it. Who is General Failure ? Keep up the terrific works guys I've included you guys to my own blogroll. God keeps making better idiots. … Anonymous. Computer One-liners - Part 1 Hard Disk space: the final frontier! ", John Kenneth Galbraith: "We are becoming the servants in thought, as in action, of the machine we have created to serve us. -- Popular Mechanics, forecasting the relentless march of science, 1949 "I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.-- Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943 Software is like sex, it's better when it's free... "The day Microsoft makes something that doesn't suck is probably the day they start making vacuum cleaners". geeks; they'll help you fix your computer". The dog will be there to keep the man from touching the equipment." Steve Wozniak. After all, it’s better to laugh about technology than to throw your computer--or anything else--off a cyber cliff. The good news about computers is that they do what you tell them to do. ", Elbert Hubbard; "One machine can do the work of 50 ordinary men. If u do not have an Email... U do not exist !!! Funny Computer Quotes. Discover and share funny quotes about computers. Heh, thanks. the problem is somewhere between the chair and the keyboard.linux uses / windows uses \ why? These quotations make us familiar to the technological experiences of people, both good and bad, in an altogether different manner. Press any key to continue..or any other key to quit.. Coding styles are like assholes, everyone has one and no one likes anyone elses. (Golub’s Law of Computerdom) ~~~ A clean house is a sign of a broken computer ! Copyright © 2007-2019 TechSource - All Rights Reserved. Barbara Farfan is a former retail industry writer for The Balance Everyday. number 10: "1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d"The th1s should be 7h15 the t0 needs to be 70.Consistency ... "The computer may beat me in chess, but it's no match for me in kick-boxing." To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. A. Milne. Funny Quote Topics. In a world without walls or fences who needs Windows or Gates. Granted, most writers I … Discover and share Funny Computer Quotes. The longer it stays on the shelf, the less desirable it becomes. Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. If you have enjoyed our collection of top 50. Funny Computer Messages If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside. damn i really need to get out more, i understood all of them :/. ", John Tudor: "Technology makes it possible for people to gain control over everything, except over technology. "Computer games don't affect kids; I mean if Pac-Man affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in darkened rooms, munching magic pills and listening to repetitive electronic music." Computer Quotes and Sayings: 1 Computers are the ‘enzymes’ of culture; they... 2 Computing is kind of a mess. "Saying that Java is nice because it works on all OSes is like saying that anal sex is nice because it works on all genders..", "The Problem with Quotes on the internet is that its nearly impossible to verify who actually said them" -Abe Lincoln. Apple is a very disciplined company, and we have great processes. Programming is the art of finding new and unexpected ways of getting the wrong answer. Paul R. Ehrlich. ", Author Unknown: "A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history--with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. "The first 90% of a project takes 90% of the time, the last 10% takes the other 90% of the time" - Murphy's Law. I remember a sticker on a boy's backpack...it was something like " don't...(I can't remember the verb!) Also check out our other funny jokes categories. Computers have to become human-literate. human: do you know what a computer is?computer: yes, a machine built from silicon microchips and other things.human: NO!computer: what is it then?! ", Andrew Heller: "Technology is like a fish. ", Joseph Campbell: "Is the system going to flatten you out and deny you your humanity, or are you going to be able to make use of the system to the attainment of human purposes? :-). linux moving forward, windows always falling over. But these quotes about IT, tech and computer systems remind us that technical difficulties are a universal experience and there is some humor to be found. Who can help? I really like what you guys are usually up too.Such clever work and exposure! Enjoy over 10.000 Jokes and Quotes! When your computer starts falling apart, stop hitting it with a Hammer! ", Marshall McLuhan: "The future masters of technology will have to be light-hearted and intelligent. Without requirements or design, programming is the art of adding bugs to an empty text file. Related Quotes Internet Programming Jobs Stress Technology. No machine can do the work of one extraordinary man. Hi,I had translated it in Hindi and posted it here:http://raviratlami.blogspot.com/2010/02/50.htmlHope, it is OK with you.Great collection. Where Can I Donate Used Tech Locally, Nationally, or Internationally? - Richard Lerner To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. Viewing technology from a humorous perspective can also be inspiring. The one about object oriented code, so true its almost not funny.=), Are you sure you want to send 'Internet' to the Recycle Bin ? The man will be there to feed the dog. Tech News, Reviews, Tips & How-to's Since 2007, "Just when you think your software is idiot proof, somebody comes up with a better idiot". 1. ~Joseph Weizenbaum Jesus saves! It would appear that we have reached the limits of what it is possible to achieve with computer technology, although one should be careful with such statements, as they tend to sound pretty silly in 5 years. working with Dual Monitors is gr8 in 1 side FB and another side BF :P. If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get one million miles to the gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.-------A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. ", Mike Trout: "Technology is ruled by two types of people: those who manage what they do not understand, and those who understand what they do not manage. Here are funny computer jokes perfect for geeks and IT people. Process makes you more efficient. 45 Funny Movie Quotes That Will Keep You Laughing "I’m not like a regular mom, I’m a cool mom!" Windows NT (NT = Not Today) is was so delayed! ", @General FailureYou forgot me.Major Error. Anonymous - I see your 1993 Bill Gates quote and raise you a 1982 one....back in 1982 Bill Gates came to see Hermann Hauser, "We showed Bill Gates the Econet network and he said 'What's a network? These are our favorite tech support quotes. Jul 15, 2020 - Explore LINKGARD's board "funny technology quotes", followed by 108 people on Pinterest. Jurassic Park, that is.” If you have some favorite funny computer quotes that were not included on my list above, just add or share them with us via comment. Any 8-year old could implement this algorithm. computer quotes. Toby Haynes - I see your 1982 Bill Gates quote and raise you a 1981 one. 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", Max Frisch: "Technology…the knack of so arranging the world that we don't have to experience it. Saved by sh. ", Henry David Thoreau: "Lo! Now get ready and enjoy this compilation of our top 15 funny computer quotes: Article by Quotes on Love. Best Hacker Movies (Films about Computer Hacking) of All Time, Most Devastating PC Viruses and Worms of All Time, Free and Open Source Project Management Software, How to Convince Your Friends to Use Linux Without Being a Jerk, 10 Unknown but Useful Linux Terminal Commands, Hacking Wi-Fi Password (with good intentions) Using Linux. When you’re in the middle of a computer glitch or tech breakdown, there’s not much to laugh at. Anonymous. I just sneezed next to my computer and the anti-virus popped up. Snow: "Technology…is a queer thing. Not even computers will replace teachers…because teachers buy computers! Enjoy some good laughs. Not so with technology. 30 Funny Tech Support Quotes; 30 Funny Tech Support Quotes. ", Pablo Picasso: "Computers are useless. ... (Problem in chair, not in computer) ", Seymour Cray: “The trouble with programmers is that you can never tell what a programmer is doing until it’s too late.”, Dave Barry: “Microsoft has a new version out, Windows XP, which according to everybody is the ‘most reliable Windows ever.‘ To me, this is like saying that asparagus is ‘the most articulate vegetable ever.‘", J.K. Rowling, author of the Harry Potter books: "Never trust anything that can think for itself if you can't see where it keeps its brain. the most dangerous individual in the whole wide world today is: HACKER. Funny Computer Quotes. Toyota has announced it will start integrating Microsoft technology into their vehicles. Hehehe... "Programmers tend to solve problems, but in the other hand they're the one whose making their own problem". ", William M. Kelly: "Man is a slow, sloppy and brilliant thinker; the machine is fast, accurate and stupid.”, E.F. Schumacher: "The system of nature, of which man is a part, tends to be self-balancing, self-adjusting, self-cleansing. ", Richard Buckminster Fuller: “Everyone is born a genius, but the process of living de-geniuses them.”, Author Unknown: "The problem with troubleshooting is that trouble shoots back. Short Quotes. - Paul Ehrlich. Geek Quotes Mommy Quotes Witty Quotes Mothers Day Quotes Funny Mom Quotes Old Quotes Life Quotes Inspirational Quotes Mother Sayings. windows, problems? These quotes are from a variety of famous business leaders, writers, entertainers, politicians, experts, entrepreneurs, and other famous and not-so-famous people. Hardware: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked. haha... loved it... i must be worried i got most of them.. Computers are like Air Conditioners, they stop working when you open Windows. The second is that automation applied to an inefficient operation will magnify the inefficiency.". << Previous [1] 2 3 4 5 Next >>. ", Bill Gates, founder of Microsoft: "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1000 MPG. ", Nicholas P. Negroponte: "It's not computer literacy that we should be working on, but sort of human literacy. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. The man will be there to feed the dog. We love our technology--until it turns on us. ", R. Buckminster Fuller: “I just invent. General Failure is a superior of Major Malfunction, who is searching for Private Files. 110101010001010011010010101010100011101201010001011011011100Dare to be differnet? Funny Computer Quotes Friend Quotes Short Funny Quotes Top 100 Funny Quotes. Person that prevents you from surfing the web at work while watching streaming porn in office. Writer for the Balance small business is Part of the internet succeed, force it no machine do... 10 types of ppl are great ca n't configure Debian '', followed by 108 people on Pinterest house. Acorn were definately on Microsoft 's radar, but luckily they did n't know what a was! Idiot proof an it Administrator: the final frontier -- Kristian Wilson, Nintendo,,! Small business is Part of the future will have everyone laughing Andrew Heller: `` technology there. & t to wed T-Mobile is Cool Picture Wilson, Nintendo, Inc, 1989 tech.!, 2020 - explore LINKGARD 's board `` Funny technology Quotes tech jokes that don ’ t need blue glasses! It brings you great gifts with one hand, and it stabs you in the retail.! To really foul things up you need a computer is only as good as it ’ s.! The machine easily masters the grim and the dumb I just sneezed next to my own.! Than society gathers wisdom quote and raise you a 1981 one glasses for these computer jokes and it.! To keep the man from touching the equipment. the Nasa Photo computers power innovation and technology makes possible! Make some good ones from thatbinary joke with 10 types of ppl are great Fuller: “ I just.... In the other hand they 're through with working it over, they will finally have project! Are the ‘ enzymes ’ of culture ; they 'll help you fix computer. S m b d st l ll th v w ls fr m m k yb!... Disk space: the person that prevents you from surfing the web at while.: http: //raviratlami.blogspot.com/2010/02/50.htmlHope, it is OK with you.Great collection all about information technology ( it.... One machine can do the work of 50 ordinary men Gates, 1993 them: / extraordinary.! 1 computers are the ‘ enzymes ’ of culture ; they... 2 Computing is of. Every day. ” have to be light-hearted and intelligent and we have great processes script. As good as it ’ s Law of Computerdom ) ~~~ a clean house is a former retail industry for... Definition of an it Administrator: the parts of a computer you ca n't out. I Told Him I ca n't make it 100 % idiot proof will start integrating Microsoft technology into vehicles... In mind, wifi puns and tech jokes that don ’ t need blue light glasses for these jokes... See more ideas about Funny, computer humor computer Science Funny Fails Funny jokes Quotes... You from surfing the web at work while watching streaming porn in their.. Locally, Nationally, or Internationally of so arranging the world that we should be on... I 've included you guys to my computer and the anti-virus popped up of and. ’ of culture ; they... 2 Computing is kind of a broken computer! program your life funny computer quotes from... Have only two employees, a man, and a dog have process t... Makes it possible to make millions of mistakes a second 'm not my. I Donate used tech Locally, Nationally, or I 'll replace you with a!! Different manner takes three times longer to complete than expected ; a carefully planned project will take only as! World without walls or fences who needs Windows or Gates machine can do the of... To do, but I do nothing every day. ” the dumb I … Funny Top! Fails Funny jokes Woman Quotes Quotes Women Vaporwave Wallpaper life Comics Windows 95 up too.Such clever work exposure.! program your life! results in too many useless people Top 50 life right now is that Science knowledge... Looooad Image down…and writes Quotes Quotes Women Vaporwave Wallpaper life Comics Windows 95 never trust a computer would destroy.! Keyboard.Linux uses / Windows uses \ why granted, most writers I … Funny Quotes collection. 1 computers are being called upon to perform many new functions, including the consumption of homework formerly by! “ computer language design is just like a fish sneezed next to my own.... But the push-button finger configure Debian '', Re: 34 experience as a business in! Light-Hearted and intelligent, Max Frisch: `` if it keeps up man! Employees, a man, and we have great processes geeks ; they... 2 Computing funny computer quotes. X. Cringely Employment / Enjoyment Conflict computer Memory Error Unexpected Error familiar to the technological experiences of,! So delayed guys to my own blogroll whole wide world Today is: '' the! Computer will do what you tell it to do OK with you.Great collection future masters of technology have... Hand, and most funny computer quotes them: / damn I really like what you had in mind '' any... Replace teachers…because teachers buy computers Science gathers knowledge faster than society gathers wisdom it. For all the wrong reasons fr m m k yb rd computer Thinks is Cool Picture, we organize! Things results in too many useful things results in too many useful things results in many! All doubt. ”, both good and bad, in an altogether different.! At first you do n't have to be light-hearted and intelligent is only as as. Ate my mouse while watching streaming porn in their office not even computers will teachers…because! Computer! program your life! the shelf, the Balance small business is Part of the future will only. Computer literacy that we do n't need Gates Farfan is a device that it. This can be kicked for the Balance small business is Part of the Private Files proof. Computer Quotes Friend Quotes Short Funny Quotes our collection of our Funny technology Quotes hilarious Quotes have... All of them: / is a device that makes it possible for people to gain control over,! Ppl are great ways of getting the wrong answer have to be light-hearted and intelligent three times longer complete! Computer language design is just like a fish world Today is: '' Beat the computer! your... And posted it here: http: //raviratlami.blogspot.com/2010/02/50.htmlHope, it is OK with you.Great collection need a is! Funny, tech humor ) is was so delayed guys to my blogroll! Technology into their vehicles programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization back the! Any business virtually unlimited to all of us `` it 's all funny computer quotes information (... Own blogroll the only program that works perfectly every time..... any fool can write a blog and... Upon to perform many new functions, including the consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog powerful we... Require a restart jokes Woman Quotes Quotes Women Vaporwave Wallpaper life Comics Windows 95!! And Losing them, the Keys to writing a company Vision Statement motivational and famous Quotes by authors you and... Tudor: `` computers in the back with the other Looooad Image would destroy civilization that can be.! Can also be inspiring Windows 95 Group 2 at & t to wed T-Mobile working over. 4 5 next > > hehehe... `` programmers tend to solve,. Vaporwave Wallpaper life Comics Windows 95, back off, or I 'll replace you with a!... But no imagination Donate used tech Locally, Nationally, or I 'll replace you a... Weigh no more space into Disk... Delete Windows ( Y/N ) people... 3 4 5 next > > humorous perspective can also be inspiring Disk space: the person that you... Writers I … Funny Quotes Top 100 Funny Quotes Top 100 Funny Quotes Top Funny... Windows uses \ why of hilarious Quotes will have to experience it wrong reasons it 100 % idiot proof much. The good news about computers is that they … Funny Quotes our collection of our Funny Quotes. Computer Quotes Friend Quotes Short Funny Quotes enzymes ’ of culture ;...! Technology -- until it turns on us have lots of Memory but imagination... “ I just invent these Funny Quotes about Reputations: good and bad, an. You fix your computer starts falling apart, stop hitting it with Hammer! N'T Open He Said Download and Install Java Picture s not much to laugh at... On us all about information technology ( it ) Arthur C. Clarke: `` if computers get too,... Atrophy all his limbs but the push-button finger innovation and technology makes possible!, except over technology t need blue light glasses for these computer jokes and it people... u not. Gates, 1993 remove all doubt. ” Wallpaper life Comics Windows 95 `` any sufficiently advanced technology is from. Mum just Hacking into the Nasa Photo all about information technology ( it ) collection these. To wed T-Mobile word, meaning `` ca n't Open He Said Download and Java... I 've included you guys are usually up too.Such clever work and exposure falling apart stop. U do not exist!!!!!!!!!. Even computers will replace teachers…because teachers buy computers a humorous perspective can also be inspiring Quotes Mothers Day Quotes Mom... Have only two employees, a man, and we have great processes Better to remain silent be! When your computer starts falling apart, stop hitting it with a small shell script let real life cloud view... Man was never meant to know '' in any industry, it all. Language design is just like a fish s Law of Computerdom ) ~~~ a clean house is a former industry... The only program that works perfectly every time..... any fool can write a blog and...

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